Unlike other years, in finding myself wondering this time around what the day really means, I decided to read up on it. Fortunately for me, as April 1 now draws to a close, I seem to have emerged unscathed. It looks like the same might not be said however for Mitt Romney!
There she is??
I didn’t get mine. Did you get yours?
The guest list was unveiled over the weekend for this Friday’s Royal Wedding, and it looks like more than a few people did not receive their invitation. Not that this is so horrible; it simply leaves me to wonder if any of the eliminees are really griping about it. Personally, I think I’m fine with not going, and I hope you quickly get over it as well. Just chalk it up to that alleged “Camilla influence,” especially if you were ever rude to her. This will teach you!
It looks like our chances would have been better if we ever dated William or Kate. After all, both of them have invited at least some of their exes! Good for them, I say, as I’m pretty sure I’ll do the same for my own wedding. Herein lies some influence that just may have superseded the Duchess of Cornwall’s plan, unless of course all of them were always nice to her.
Meanwhile, if you desperately need to take your mind off all the final Royal Wedding preparations this week, perhaps you should sit down with a bag of jelly beans and see if you can find the bride, again! Your replica, however, will likely not yield the apparent profit of the “original.” Still, you might influence some type of “Royal Watchers” to open their wallets, so it would appear.
In any event, this is one rare and memorable week of Royal Melodrama, fueled by seemingly endless humor, hysteria and downright insanity, all held together by crisscrossing waves of “influence.” May it all continue. My attention is growing, dare I admit.
It should come as no surprise that my favorite Super Bowl commercials were those for cars. Perhaps the surprise lies in the idea that a rival to my always-preferred Mercedes-Benz seems to have stolen the show, at least in my book.
Of course the MBZ spot was absolutely fantastic and powerfully moving, so to speak, laden with captivating nostalgia while launching us into an exciting future. It’s at least my number two. Then, another extensively and brilliantly produced car spot held my attention all the way to its disappointing finish. In this case, the revelation of just exactly the car being advertised was a pure let down. Sorry KIA, while your spot had me going there, you yourself don’t excite me. Thankfully, I got a good chuckle out of BMW’s ad for the 335d, as it poked exaggerated yet somewhat truthful fun at the various “dirty” diesels of yesteryear. All the while, amid mounds of visual stimulation and historical contemplation, I do believe my choice of favorite Super Bowl ad, if I were to choose just one, has to go to the celebrity-studded work of comedy itself, one I’ll need to watch a couple more times to thoroughly absorb all its crisscrossing elements. This “winner” of which I speak, to my aforementioned surprise, is Audi. The new A8 has arrived via advertising dominance!
Beer and chips sell themselves as far as I’m concerned. This said, I do appreciate Dorito’s homoerotic undertones, intentional or not. Meanwhile, the NFL itself touched the nostalgia nerve in a wonderful way. And any appearance by the terrifically shameless Joan Rivers, complete in all her camp, always spells success. Last night’s was no exception. Finally, with another nod to homoeroticism, let’s not forget to “cram it in the boot!” Mini’s hysterical ad is most certainly my number three!
Out of all of this, including all I’m forgetting to mention, the car ads stand as my winners. I’m just sorry Betty White was too busy to make any appearance this time around!
All said, that’s my opinion!
I could not have written it better myself! Well now, really I could have, only I would have cited a slightly different list of examples throughout my prose.
You certainly get the point of this timely article in The Onion, I trust, as it shines brightly through the generous supply of dry humor and cynicism that makes for a fantastic satirical “news” article. In any case, this has to be the most “unique” of all the varied assessments I’ve read of President Obama’s SOTU speech this week.
Isn’t satire a wonderful thing? There’s always some truth between the lines, which makes it all the funnier.
And that’s my opinion, of course.
Apparently the phrase has been around a while, while I’ve just now taken notice. Fortunately, an internet search indicates I’m not alone in finding the words downright laughable. There they were on an overhead monitor as I was making my way through the TSA checkpoint at Dulles this week: “Thank you for participating in security.”
Really? For what exactly are we being thanked? It seems akin to telling a Vietnam Veteran: Thank you for participating in the draft!
And that’s… (you got it.)
The day is here, again. Merry Christmas everyone!
On this auspicious occasion come some important tips. At issue here is your responsibility to ensure style, class and overall panache throughout this day of seemingly endless merriment. If you’re dressing up and heading to dinner at a luxury resort, you have it made. If, however, you’re relegated to a relative’s home, personal flair is not to be dismissed.
First off, you must of course dress well. Secondly, and more crucially, it’s vital that your host is serving on the finest china and crystal that happens to be in the house. This is no day for paper and plastic.
Even I opted out of a tie, for the first time in five years.
I suffered such an atrocity yesterday, at a relative’s home gathering. I was told the glass could get broken, and that the plastic plates were easier for the clean-up process. This reasoning simply does not fly. If you agree to host, you simply must face the aftermath. No compromise here. Then, what day of the year trumps Christmas as the time to break out the finest? If anything happens to get broken, that’s life!
Don’t let my suffering happen to you! Make sure you’re drinking from at least glass and eating off of china, with full silverware! If you’re visiting relatives today in a trailer park, you may need to furnish such service. In any event, no doubt you’ll look fabulous doing so! While a tie is of course preferred, a cashmere turtleneck is indeed an acceptable alternative.
The resort is still the way to go, if you’re on the fence. The wine will make it all run smoothly, no matter where you are. And that’s my opinion. Cheers!
Among all else, I’m always one for a healthy dose of satire, on just about any topic under the stars. As such, as an addendum to my entry yesterday regarding DADT, I’m now happy to present the satirical bend on the topic.
The Onion is absolutely fantastic and has been so for years. I highly recommend it as one of your regular news sources, if for nothing else than to consider an issue from its humorous point of view. Just don’t make the mistake that one Chinese journalist did a few years back, of reporting an Onion story as fact.
In any case, satirical news lives and must live, on anything and everything! And that’s my opinion.
In the spirit of the now-almost-classic movie “There’s Something About Mary,” I’m thinking now of a sequel. Perhaps it should be titled “There’s Something About Bristol,” or “There’s Something About Sarah,” or better yet, “There’s Something About Anyone Named Palin.”
After I wrote here just last week about how the Palins seem to incite strong and distinct reactions from friend and foe alike, now comes this laughable bit of news. Really now!? I mean, the girl might not have talent, but is she worth destroying your television? I think it’s safe to say it’s “not just her” in this particular case, though it’s fairly amusing to think she could be the “last straw.”
There’s something about this entire turn of events. I’m not sure what it is exactly, but it sure makes for a fun news story!
And that’s my opinion.
This Monday morning arrives at the end of a weekend chalk full of TSA talk. What I discussed here last week is continuing to flourish, more and more every day. This is to say, the dialogue is continuing, the debate is escalating, the dissent is growing, and refreshingly and thankfully so, the satirical take on airport security is in fresh, full bloom!
For or against the newest airport security procedures, just about everyone seems to have something to say. This includes Secretary of State Hillary Clinton, who appeared yesterday on CBS’ “Face the Nation.” More than just hallow political blabber, she’s actually touching on a key point while perhaps very subtlely steering the debate down the right path. She says: “If there’s a way to limit the number of people who are going to be put through surveillance…” Secretary Clinton is on to something here. I think I know what it is, and perhaps you do too. After all, she herself says she would avoid one of the new enhanced pat-downs, while adding that in terms of current airport security processes described by many as overly aggressive, she “understands how offensive it must be.”
In the meantime, Saturday Night Live this past weekend jumped into the overall commentary with this very funny skit. Humor always makes unpleasant realities more easy to endure, while shining a necessary light on such claims of foolishness, overkill or just plain stupidity. Thank God for a sense of humor, and for the right to express it!
And that’s my opinion.
Ryan R. Sanderson 